So I'm at Wal Fart preparing for the snowstorm (which thanks to me being prepared will now be a tepid, light rain) and I get all my shit and nonsense that I deemed necessary. Grapes and fucking waffles. And I make my way around the empty store (cause, damn I was there at 8:57 am, son). And get on the fucking line. Of course I have about 30 things, so I can't get on the express. And they have 450 registers butt only one open. So I get on a line seven deep and everyone else has their fucking nonsense and grapes and waffles and the checker? OMG so slow. Beep, bag slow pause. beep...........bag. Tie the bag in a fucking knot.. (why? who cares) beep.....chatty chat.....bag.
And I am dying in my head. Wishing I wasn't so damn paranoid of the snow. I used to be a New Yorker for fuck's sake! I drove in everything. And standing there for 15 minutes and NO ONE is moving. Grrrrrowwwwlll. Then I had an evil idea. I pulled out my cell phone and used my browser to look for the store I was in's phone number. Then I dialed the fucking number.
And then I spoke to customer service and said in a polite voice, "Can you please look at your registers? I'm the seventh person in line and my frozen stuff is melting. Can you send either another checker or a mop to clean up my ice cream? Thanks."
They sent a checker! I felt like I was calling 911 from the back of a cop car.