Poop stories

My small sized poodle is 90% house trained. So I had a great idea and bought him reusable training diapers, but the dog ones were really expensive so I got a nice three pack at Wal-Mart. I was really proud of myself because I saved money and used a scissor to cut a hole for his little stump tail. It worked like a charm because he never went in the diaper. So well that even the husband was on board with putting the diaper on and off the dog’s crazy ass for trips outside, where he did his business (the dog). We had like 3 weeks of normal (Well as normal as having a dog in a diaper can be) and one thing the husband said more than once was, “This is fine but I’m never ever changing that diaper if it gets dirty.” I laughed. It was working so well, I just had to wash one fairly clean diaper a day, nicey nice.

Then I had an event to go to that was really ritzy, got all dressed up, make up done, fake lashes, the whole deal. I got in the car and took off about 2 miles down the road my husband calls the cell.
“Your God damn dog s&%t his diaper!”

I had to pull over because I was laughing so hard. There was no way I could come home to deal with it, so it was on him. I found out later he took the poodle out back and hosed the poop off of him. I had to pull over because I was laughing so hard. There was no way I could come home to deal with it, so it was on him. I found out later he took the poodle out back and hosed the poop off of him.

Recently, if you’re like me you get too many animals and they poop places. Right now we live in an apartment where you pick the poo up. So I have three dogs. To quote Edward I say to poop, “You are my life now.” The best is that I have to count off the nugglets so I know how many to pick up. And one of my dogs likes to walk and poop so it is like a horrible, horrible Easter egg hunt with a $250 fine if you fail to find the “egg”

And lots of bags (which I feel bad about, but I have to use the bags) and now besides counting, watching. etc. I grumble about turds not being “bag worthy”

2 comments:

  1. Since I work with animals, dogs and cats to be specific, I can totally appreciate this story. ROFL!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I used to want a dog, until I started working for a family which had one.
    Never again.....

    ReplyDelete

 

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